H is for Hardees . . .

Gotta love those truck-stop fast food places along the interstate, huh? No, in all fairness, this Hardees was quite nice, with great service and yummy food (okay, we're talking relatively here . . .). However, the resteraunt will never hear this positive feedback, for the comment cards that they handed us with our food served a much more noble cause . . . the medium for an inspiring story about a special pair of pants . . .

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"It all started with knickerbockers. Not just any old pair of knickerbockers, they were special knickerbockers. Special because they were bright blue with islver buckles. Now, these special knickerbockers belonged to a very special homo sapien -- a man bearing the name *heart* Antonio Banderas *heart* . . . *sigh* . . .

One day, "Anty"--as his friends called him-- found that stories don't always go like the girls want; and he found it out the hard way when a piano with keys made out of TNT fell on him and exploded, killing him instantly and forever. Only the knickerbockers survived, but in the explosion, the not-so-pretty-anymore pants were lost and forgotten . . .

At least until a handsome explorer by the handsome name of "Chris" and the handsome looks of a Leodardo DiCaprio look-alike, found them while searching in a distant jungle for the treasure of his lifetime.

He had initially mistaken the pair of pants for an exotic and rare species of South American salamander, but quickly realized his misconception when it didn't ooze slimy puss when he stomped on it. This was a good sign, where most things were poisonous--"Like snakes," he thought to himself. "I hate snakes."

Chris stooped over to pick up his new discovery, and, quite ironically, his pants--which his mommy had apparently left in the dryer for too long--split with a loud "rrRRRIIIPPPpp!" ( . . . although, if pants rip in the jungle and there's no one there to hear them, do they make any noise? . . .) ANYway---

Chris found himself in need of a pair of knickerbockers, so, against his better judgement--for they had been in the jungle for who-knows-how long, and they were bright blue--he decided to try on the pants he had just found. They were a good fit. They were also, unfortunately, somewhat hideous. "What woman will want me now?!" he cried out loud in despair.

But he found a pretty girl in the Swiss Alps, and started a knickerbocker store. He was taken, and happy :)
*
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SO, this was a joint effort between Shalyn, Tami, Moryam and myself in the middle of a long car trip back to the 'dale . . . I'll leave it up to you to figure out who wrote what ;)

*story not divided into paragraphs by writers, but by editor (me!), for dramatic effect ;)